Tag Archives: Gmail

The Gchat Betrayal

2 Jul

Gchat and I have always been BFF’s. It makes me laugh, it makes me sigh. When people ask me what I do at work, I tell them I Gchat like a boss. But Gchat betrayed me, and I may never look at it the same way again.

You may remember Derek, my “friend” who I may or may not have gone on a date with depending on who you ask. Well, Derek and I still hang out. And for weeks I continued to consciously ignore the building sexual tension that accompanied our trips to chipotle, watching an occasional movie, and my personal favorite – going to a shooting range. This all changed whenever one night, after finishing up a documentary about education reform (very sexy stuff) he kissed me.

Crap. This is what I had been trying to avoid. I like Derek, and I know he likes me more… But I can’t date him, or anyone, at this point because when it comes to relationships I am anything but stable right now. And I care about him too much to just string him along until I figure out what my issues are and possibly royally screw him over.

This is where Gchat comes into play.

The following morning, I log onto my work computer, immediately pull up Gmail (like every other human being in America, this is always my first task), and see who is online. One of my best friends from college is on and immediately I begin my story. I tell her how we were hanging out, he kissed me, and I told him it was a bad idea and that we needed to stop. At this point in the conversation, Derek also messaged me on Gchat (you may see where this is going). Wanting to give my girlfriend some background information on Derek, I copy a link to his facebook page and paste it into the Gchat box.

It was the wrong Gchat box.

But did I stop there? Oh no. In fact, here is, word for word, exactly what I sent to Derek before realizing who I was messaging:

Me:

Here’s his facebook… feel free to creep away
he went to ******* college and now works at The ********
I think his job is super sexy
and he himself isn’t unattractive
Oh my god
OH MY GOD
Shit
Derek
I’m so sorry
That wasn’t meant to send to you
oh my god
Fuck
I’m so so sorry

I couldn’t believe I had done that. Gchat had betrayed me. Hadn’t we gone through enough together? Hadn’t I confided all of my secrets to it/friends over the past years? Why had it automatically popped up Derek’s chat box when I was speaking to my other friend??

At this point, my hands were literally shaking as I awaited some form of a response from Derek. My co-workers, who aren’t used to me saying anything more offensive than “damn” were quite shocked to hear me exclaim the F-word for anyone within a 30 foot radius to hear.

Finally, Derek messaged back saying: Well… that was flattering. He claims that it was “cute” and “funny” and that I had nothing to worry about… But obviously I did worry about it. Not only did I humiliate myself, but I also completely reversed any thought in his mind that I wanted to keep things between us as “just friends”.

I know that it could have been worse. I could have insulted him, or given away even more mortifying comments before catching myself. But the point is, this happened. Gchat went rogue. And a week later, I’m terrified to take myself off of the “invisible” status.

Some day, I hope to rekindle the passion and vigor I had used with my favorite messaging system. But I believe our relationship needs to take a step back so we can re-evaluate things. Until then, it looks like I’ll have to do real life things during the day… like work.


Belle.