5 Ways Finding a Job and Finding a Man Are the Same Damn Struggle

22 May

This week, my dream job was posted online and I. Have. To. Get. It. I’ve spent the last 48 hours freaking out to all of the SR ladies and basically anyone who will listen. In an especially inspiring Gchat with Anne (thanks babe), she gave me the motivation I need. “Go for it,” Anne encouraged me. “Shark that job like you’d shark a guy at a bar.”

It got me thinking: finding a job is actually exactly like finding a man. How, you ask?

5. “I don’t want to come off as desperate” is not a thing. If you find yourself saying this, GTFO.

no really

This is a lesson I learned from job searching that I then realized applies to dating. Most of the people around me who have gotten jobs that I think were awesome and/or wish I had have done it by, quite honestly, being pathetic. You have to be honest with people about the fact that you’re looking for a job and you need their help — and a paycheck. This is not dissimilar to being single and having trouble approaching a new guy, or having trouble opening up to someone. It’s hard to show vulnerability but the alternative is waiting for things to happen to you and waiting forever because you never told anyone that you wanted those things to happen.

4. Connections matter. New boi’s roommates like you? A former supervisor is willing to drop the possible new boss a note saying how great you are? You’d be shocked how much it helps. Life is not a meritocracy. You’re IN. 

AKA, if you wanna be his lover, you gotta get with his friends.

Except don’t confuse the metaphors and get with your boss’ friends.

3. You won’t find the best ones online. Ok, ok, this isn’t quite true. (Actually, the SR ladies are stepping up their online dating game this week and although I’m a little skeptical, I’m rapidly dropping my old-school aversion to the idea.) In fact, while in the workplace you put yourself out there by getting offline (i.e. talking to people and networking and other scary things), in the dating world putting yourself out there involves getting online.

But where the similarities remain is that only looking online – for a job or for a man – does allow you to pre-select based only on what you already know. And that may mean that you allow yourself to close your mind to other options. Maybe you never thought you’d work in finance – just like you never thought you’d date an Asian guy.

2. You’re almost always more qualified than you think. Whether it’s not applying because you don’t meet all the stated qualifications or not going up to a guy at a bar because you think he’s too hot to talk to you, STOP. We ladies tend to underestimate ourselves but I promise, you’re way more awesome than you think you are…

1…..but sometimes, you might have to accept that you’re just not a good fit

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