What I’m Thankful For: Postgrad Edition

28 Nov

by Brownout Betty

In general, there are, of course, many things to be thankful for today, from the poop emoji to the (hopeful) mercy that the SR editorial gods will have on me for being late posting this (Mama Betty put me to work in the kitchen, I’m sorry!). But there is a particular category of things I’m thankful for this year, since it’s the first time in my postgrad era that my parents are hosting BrownoutGiving. So it’s this particular sensation of truly coming #homefortheholidays that’s spurring a lot of thankful thoughts. Here are the top 10 things this postgrad is thankful for:

10. That I wasn’t the deadbeat jobless weirdo at the high school reunion on Thanksgiving eve. Always good to be able to tell people you’re at least employed.

9. That my relatives broke out the wine before I headed to said high school reunion. Nothing like a little liquid courage, amirite?

8. That my parents didn’t raise their eyebrows too high at my extreme enthusiasm for said wine. Stealth alcoholism, achieved.

7. That I didn’t repeat college mistakes and make out with that rando from high school whose charms drunken Betty just can’t seem to resist.

6. That my mom had a heating pad readily available for me when I woke up this morning with a roaring backache thanks to the janky ass mattress that now occupies my bed (Baby Betty, Brownout Betty’s scheming sister, stole my Tempurpedic the second I left the house but we’re not talking about it).

5. That there’s still like half a drawer of space for my stuff in my room after everyone and their mother started treating it like a storage closet. #thanksguys

4. That even though Mama Betty’s fancy digital scale is delivering bad news on the weight gain front, it’s fancy and digital so AT LEAST I KNOW THE HARD TRUTH (this one was painful to even type out, folks).

Belle, babe, you were so right.

3. That Daddy Brownout was kind enough to bring me Dunkin Donuts coffee AND orange juice for my post-Thanksgiving-eve hangover this morning, all without asking questions.

2. That I’ve managed to get the family so focused on my future grad school plans that no one is remembering to ask me about whether I have a boyfriend.

1. That I was able to come home for Thanksgiving rather than already being here – in other words, that I don’t still live in this place, and that after a few days I’m out of here again. 


Whether you’re home with the family or home in your freezing postgrad apartment with Netflix as your replacement family or somewhere else, we want to hear what you’re thankful for! Leave us a comment and let us know. Happy Thanksgiving from the SR ladies!


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