10 Ways Olivia Pope Would Have Avoided the Shutdown

11 Oct

As I sit here drinking $5 red wine from my “Olivia Pope Wine Glass”, waiting for my future self to grace my living room with her presence, I couldn’t help but wonder (many people on Twitter also wondered the same thing last week); WHAT WOULD OLIVIA POPE HAVE DONE TO AVOID THE SHUTDOWN?

Answer: all of the things, but the top 10 of those things are below:

SPOILER ALERT… if you’re not a real gladiator, stop reading and spend the next 24 hours getting on my level, then return to this list.

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10. Been completely over dramatic and used the “Providence” code to have a top secret meeting in a Nuclear War bunker

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9. Hooked up with Edison Davis  Harry Reid to distract him and let the White House do its job

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8. Invited Cyrus Beene Denis McDonough over for a huge glass of red wine

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7. Hauled house Rs into her office and dangled her knowledge of their sex scandals in their faces until they cracked

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6. Killed an intern (it’s still slightly unclear why…)

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5. Fitz and Quinn hacked healthcare.gov to ensure neither it nor its subsidiaries went live

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4. Called an ex-boyfriend who works at the NSA and discovered that Ted Cruz’s 21 hour standoff was actually pre-recorded over several months

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3. Sent Harrison and Abby to Sonoma to drag dirt about the Dem caucus out of this guy

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2. Kissed and/or slapped the President into submission

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1. Gotten Mitt Romney elected via Defiance, Ohio, and one hell of a cover up.

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I could honestly list a million more ways Olivia would have avoided the shutdown, but let’s hear yours. What do you think were Liv’s finest moments that would have avoided this absolute tragedy?

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#brohugs and kisses,

Anne

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One Response to “10 Ways Olivia Pope Would Have Avoided the Shutdown”

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